Lengthening Study Habits With Music

Sunday, April 3, 2011

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release IX"

02.23
With all the courage that she can muster, Elise forced her self towards the slightly opened door of her Room. She peered inside the Room with caution as if expecting M.O.T.H to be inside trying to steal any letters left or the pictures even. But she saw no one and immediately she hurried towards the drawers where she last saw the pictures, picked a handful of them and laid them on her bed. She sat beside the pictures and fixed her hair, letting it dangle from one side of her head.

She could see nothing significant about most of them for they were just photos of the Mansion and the surrounding Forests nearby. She had almost given up hope when she lifted the last batch of the pictures, but under it all was a photo of her self. It was taken somewhere near the Church for the belfry can be seen at the background.

And a surge of pain rushed up to the back of her head, she gripped the bed linens in agony while tears welled up to her eyes. The pain slowly recedes from her head and gone it went, she uttered a cry from the excruciation.

As she wiped her eyes of tears she noticed that she had accidentally flipped her picture on the floor and on its back her name is written,

"Maria Thia Elise Motsville"

And at long last, she recalls some memories but are still intangible for they flash only for short moments in her mind.

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise"

*name above is an anagram. :D

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release VIII"

02.22
Elise wakes up to another morning inside The Mansion, the location of which is still veiled under the mysteries of the Hills and Forests that surrounds it. It has been a couple of days since her first morning inside her room, and the anxiety, fear, and sadness that she felt then reminds her of the fact that she needs to answer the thousand and one questions that springs up her head every time she is still under the watch of M.O.T.H. And one way for her to explore the unfathomable mystery of her situation, she must first find the "husband" that has been her company ever since through those letters.

Letters.

None of the letters can be found. Elise, hid them under her pillows the night before, when M.O.T.H was in her room checking her.

"Could it have occurred that M.O.T.H might have got hold of the letters? What's in it for her anyway?", asking herself silently.
Now, Elise' trailing for clues among those letters is thwarted by their enigmatic disappearance. But she still sees hope. She starts to wander alone along the halls of The Mansion without fear of M.O.T.H. She has managed to stay completely calm even though she could feel her presence almost everywhere she goes.

"How could I forget about those!"

Elise remembered the pictures under the drawers of her desk while caressing the Portraits on the Halls. Maybe those were spared from disappearing, and she rushed up towards her room with a grin on her face.

But the door of her room is slightly open, and suspicion starts to sink into her as she draws her hand closer to the door...

*With the letters obviously lost, this edition is published rather eccentric compared to my former notes. Please bear with the dramatic change. :]

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release VII"

02.21
To the Woman whose Love I will yearn for endlessly, My Wife, Elise.

Though I have been so much privileged to be able to see you almost every day, I still could not stand being jealous of your friends who can hold you so dear in their arms while you share laughters brought about by your ecstatic conversations.

You may describe these things as shallow and senseless yet they haunt me each time I stay unnoticed at your background. I feel so helpless when I know I could do so much just to let these things show. But I got to be honest that even though I can clearly understand my situation I still dread the possibility of rejection.

I regret times like these when I can only convey what I feel through words pristinely and with eloquence. I pray that these times may eventually end with a dreamy confession. But until that moment arrives, I may have to stay secretly and hopelessly in love with you, Elise.

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise."

*"Y-yes milady?", Elise replies stammering.
"I just came in to check on how you were doing my dear"
"I am perfectly fine milady, you need not to worry of me"

Elise struggles to find courage in speaking up to M.O.T.H, she grips the stack of papers that she was just trying to begin reading again since after waking up on that fateful morning. After M.O.T.H had checked her out, she hid the letters under her pillows and tried to get herself to sleep. She has got no more energy left on her after the encounter from the dreadful lady of the House.

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release VI"

02.20
To the Painter that has Stroked a Wide Smile on My Sullen Countenance, My Wife, Elise.

Earlier this day, I was so close to losing what's left of my sanity as brought about by the constant hammer strikes of Life unto my Existence. I felt as though I was stripped bare and had been left to die in some cold place comparable to the likes of Siberia. But that feeling was much greater than being in Exile. Even more miserable than Pandora's Grief as she unleashed Chaos into the World, for she had Hope at the very least, while I felt betrayed by any signs of a promising future.

Reciprocation. If only the Elise of My Time could reciprocate my obvious intentions, then i could still manage to endure more and forbear complaining. However, she could not, unless, perchance I can find the Courage to Confess.

And I don't have the right to blame Elise for my own fault, my Cowardice.

And even though I consider my self a Pragmatic person, I can not make Elise' passivity an excuse and find someone who loves me rather than choose the one I am in love with. Regrets just kills me.

Besides, a man could not resort to calling out to Satan if God does not answer back when he calls. He may just be busy doing preparations for a grand Surprise for the man.

Hence, I will continue to live with Elise forever in my Thoughts and perhaps One Day at my side.



"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise."

*Elise is troubled. The young maid has told her that all of the workers in the Mansion were brought by a carriage and were blindfolded. So, no person can give her any details of where exactly they are and as result of Elise' strolls, she could dwell only with the obvious fact that the Mansion is erected in the middle of a Valley surrounded with Hills that are thick with trees.

But of all the workers in the Mansion, M.O.T.H has had the longest stay and may even be knowledgeable about her presence there. However, Elise feels something eerie about the woman.

Elise must find a way to displace herself away from the Mansion and fast. For in the deep recesses of her mind, she detects a scheme that may endanger her life and she finds hope through her "husband". If she can find him soon then he may be able to shed light upon the mystery on which she is situated, like the way M.O.T.H sheds light in her room by unrolling the curtains while Elise is indulged in her thoughts.

"Hello, darling..."

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release V"

02.19
To the Silhouette against my Sunsets, My Wife, Elise.

As you turned to say goodbye, sunlight gleamed pass your cheeks and at that moment I felt jealous of the Sun, for it to be able to kiss you goodbye as it ends our day. What bliss it might have been for a certain Creation of God. But I could spare no time to sulk and to get down being negative again about what I lack. Instead, I thanked God for allowing me to have found you and constantly asked Him if he would permit me to be right beside you more often than always and much longer than eternity.

I continue to ask God's blessing, while I formulate plans on how to impress your Mother.

No tulips, no love letters (that i can courageously send), no phone calls, no silverworks,  no confessions.
All I am able to do to win you as my bride is to arduously finish my studies and to ask God that He keep you until I make  my self deserving of you.

Until that time comes, I shall love you in a subtle way, Elise.

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise."


*Elise suddenly finds herself walking down the long winding stairs towards a table where her breakfast is served. The Elderly Lady clasps her hands from behind her and guides her towards her chair. She is made to sit comfortably by one maid, who looks far more younger than the others who were standing behind the Elderly Lady. She almost did not see them, if it wasn't for the Elderly Lady who again rolled the curtains and poured light into the room.

Elise was left alone just before she finished her meal, the younger maid stayed with her.

"If I may ask, who could that old woman be?",Elise whispered to the maid as if she can feel the Lady's presence lurking somewhere near.

"We only know her by a title, Mistress of The House. She doesn't own the Mansion, though. And when left by ourselves, we call her M.O.T.H for short. But you milady! Are a Beautiful Butterfly to behold.", exclaimed the maid as if she is in the presence of someone Divine.

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release IV"

02.17
To My Precious Wife, Elise.

These are times when I wake up and could only pray to God to keep you safe. It's such a shame that among thousands of words that have existed until this day, no word can still explicitly express the way I feel every time I long to see you. A concoction of anxiety and excitement. An eccentric blend of sadness accompanied by the sweet flavor of wishful thinking fills the back of my head every time I come to think of you in these solitary times.

My thoughts are with you, wherever you are.
I love you my whole life, Elise.


*Pictures fill the first of the drawers of the desk on which the letters are laid. Elise could see herself on those pictures but could not recognize everyone else. There are an awful lot of questions she wants to ask her head, hoping that her memory can still serve her good. And as her skull slowly starts to break as she concentrate her efforts into remembering things, she starts to wonder if her "husband" who wrote those letters also had pictures of himself or together with Elise even. She composed herself and tried to find if there exists their Wedding Picture

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise."

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise. release III"

02.17
To My Precious Wife, Elise.

These are times when I wake up and could only pray to God to keep you safe. It's such a shame that among thousands of words that have existed until this day, no word can still explicitly express the way I feel every time I long to see you. A concoction of anxiety and excitement. An eccentric blend of sadness accompanied by the sweet flavor of wishful thinking fills the back of my head every time I come to think of you in these solitary times.

My thoughts are with you, wherever you are.
I love you my whole life, Elise.


*Pictures fill the first of the drawers of the desk on which the letters are laid. Elise could see herself on those pictures but could not recognize everyone else. There are an awful lot of questions she wants to ask her head, hoping that her memory can still serve her good. And as her skull slowly starts to break as she concentrate her efforts into remembering things, she starts to wonder if her "husband" who wrote those letters also had pictures of himself or together with Elise even. She composed herself and tried to find if there exists their Wedding Picture

"To My Forgetful Wife, Elise."